i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
