All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
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