I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
Randomize
