Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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