she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
