You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
no you cant smoke seaweed
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Randomize
