my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
I have aggressive nipples.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
