Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
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