I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
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