That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
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