"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize