I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I would ride that face into the sunset
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
Randomize
