I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
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