I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
She bit a glass in half.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
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