my text book just quoted the cookie monster
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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