Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
You need Xanax blowdarts
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize