Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Randomize
