I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
Randomize