I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
Randomize
