guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
My ass is underappreciated
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Randomize
