Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
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