I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
and she was petting her beer can
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Randomize