respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
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