So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
Never joke about your clitoris.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
