what if every blade of grass was a penis?
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Someone signed my nipple.
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