i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
my being single is dangerous.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
