just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
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