with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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