I feel like abortions should bother me more
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Randomize
