Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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