At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I need water and some morals
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Randomize
