she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
