remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
Randomize
