obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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