I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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