so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
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