conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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