Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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