I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
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