What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
