yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
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