Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Randomize
