i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Randomize
