This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
Randomize
