I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
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