Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
Randomize