I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Randomize
