...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Randomize
