She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
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