Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
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