I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
Do you have feelings for this penis?
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Randomize
